farewell BBQ
just got home from a farewell BBQ…….all of a sudden, I’m a bit sad. Well, it’s always sad to say goodbye to a friend, right?
Chap’s new buddy left two days ago, and then a friend of mine is leaving this coming Wednesday. My doc said the last time I visited him, “Relationship comes and goes”. It seems that friendship, too—it comes and goes.
Although I haven’t hung out with this friend for a long time, we did have a lot of good memories.
I knew her before meeting Chap. Chap broke up with his ex not long after we had become friends, and then this friend was joking to him that he should think about dating me. Who knew a joke would come true?
I never thought I’d go out with Chap. He looked like a younger brother to me (though I found out later that he was actually like an elder brother—taking care of me.) Anyway, things are always not in the way you expected.
I thought it would just be a short relationship — one that would last for at most a year.
I thought I just loved his company.
I thought I just wanted him to take care of me.
I thought I would never love him very much cuz I thought the one I loved most was my ex — the one I dumped because of Chap. (The one you choose to be with is not necessarily the one you love most, right?)
Of course, all that I thought TRUE turned out to be NOT TRUE.
You know what? I’m scared of changes. I freak out in face of challenges (though I told them I loved challengs when I applied for Engineering—well, that explains why I switched out.) However, I also get bored easily.
Looking back these years with Chap….. I made mistakes from time to time either because of curiosity or out of boredom.
I know ……when things started to go in a loop, your life was too quiet….. nothing special was happening……you would make things happen yourself…… something bad…… cuz good things are not fun eh? Not exciting eh?
Anyway, I dunno what I’m saying. I always think that I’m in the middle of good and bad. ….. oh …… whatever!
Add comment August 22nd, 2005